SELF HELP ACTUALLY WORKS
Does self-help really work?
I have asked that question to myself thousands of time.
The self-help section in bookstores has hundreds of books, and motivational speeches are all over the internet. Self-help is a billion dollar business, but that does not answer the question, "Does self-help really work?"
After practicing medicine for forty years, I can state with one-hundred percent certainty that it works, and sometimes it even works miracles. I know this to be true because I have seen it work in my patients who spent years living without hope at rock bottom. People barely surviving turn their lives around and steadily rise above their circumstances to make their lives into what they want them to be. It doesn't matter whether they were addicted to alcohol, hard drugs, or mediocrity, they become new people with a new way of thinking and feeling.
But self-help does not work for everyone. It only works for those who have the following three characteristics:
1. They have reached the point where they actually want to change.
2. They develop positive expectations. They believe change is possible.
3. They are willing to do whatever it takes to make change happen.
When these three things are present, self-help works its magic. If these three things are absent, all the motivational speeches and self-help books in the world will not make a difference.
Self-help actually works when you want to change, when you develop positive expectations, and when you are willing to do whatever it takes. That is why the Positive Thinking Network exists, and that is why I am the Positive Thinking Doctor.
I am changing the world one person at a time, one belief at a time, one website at a time, one graphic at a time, one podcast at a time, and one ebook at a time.
If you are ready to change your world and get a new way of thinking, feeling, and living, then Self Help UNI is for you.
The Life Long Disoriented are a diverse group of individuals from every nation and race who share many characteristics in common. At the most basic level, they don't know who they are or where they are going. They live by default rather than by design, and they are unwilling to do whatever it takes to make their dreams come true. When things don't work out, they always have an excuse, and it's never their fault. They are unable to maintain a sustained focus for the long haul. They are talkers rather than doers. They never commit themselves to anything with all their heart, mind, and strength.
Review this checklist to see how many of the following characteristics you share in common with the Life Long Disoriented.
1. They believe they can think the same old thoughts, take the same old actions, and still get a new life.
2. They don't run their own mind. Someone else runs it for them, and tells them how to think and what to do.
3. They don't know how to program their own mind. All of their programming was inherited or done by other people.
4. They are image oriented. They try to change their life by changing their image rather than by changing the way they think.
5. They don't live as if they are a great person. They don't act as if their dreams are possible and work each day to make them happen.
6. They tolerate negative thinking.
7. They haven't selected an area of excellence which they develop and give to the world.
8. They create and adopt limitations in their own mind.
9. They are outcome-oriented rather than purpose-oriented.
10. They don't control what goes into their mind.
11. They don't understand that they can change who they are by changing what they put into their mind.
12. They have never opened their heart and mind to the power of God's love. Their mind contains thoughts that are inconsistent with God's love. Their heart contains emotions that are sick and inconsistent with God's love. They don't have a personal relationship with God based on love.
13. They don't live congruently with their heart, mind, and will all heading in the same direction.
It's easy to become a member of the Life Long Disoriented. All you have to do surrender your dreams and let other people tell you what to do and how to think for the rest of your life. They will give you a small plot in Nowhere Land in which you can bury your dreams forever.
When it comes to weekly newsletters, one size does not fit all. Some individuals want a newsletter with a Christian flavor, and others want one with a secular flavor. That is why we have two different newsletters. The Positive Newsletter is for people who want positive thinking straight up, and the Positive Christian Newsletter is for those who want to organize their lives around positive Christian principles. Some people subscribe to both.
Jesus created a world ruled by expectations. You don't get what you want. You get what you expect. It doesn't matter if your expectations are positive or negative, you will still get what you expect. Jesus said, "As you believe, so shall it be done unto you. No matter how hard you work and how much you hope, it's what you expect that counts. The Law of Expectations will make or break your life. When I know your expectations, I can predict your future.
When I started my eleven year sailing voyage around the world, I had powerful positive expectations. Without positive expectations, I would never have survived storms at sea, I would not have sailed across the Indian Ocean through massive tsunami debris, and I would have never sailed up Pirate Alley between Yemen and Somalia. Without positive expectations, I would have spent my life in Nowhere Land.
Jesus is the Great Physician, and He came to planet earth to change your expectations about who you are and what you can do with your life. He came to teach people how to think the way that God thinks so that positive expectations could rule their world.
You aren't going to have to pull yourself up by your own bootstraps as you live God's dream for your life. God will be with you every step of the way. God is on your side and has your back. His plan for your life is good for you and is perfect for the type of person that you are. That is why you have positive expectations.
I am the Positive Expectations Doctor. When I get up in the morning, I don't have to think about what I am going to do on that day. I have one job and one job only. My job is to change people's expectations about who they are and what they can do with their lives. The easiest thing to do on planet earth is to pass out pills to patients, and the hardest thing to do is change their expectations.
Fear is a liar, and if you listen to the voice of fear, you will never live your dreams. When I was sailing through the Bab Al Mandeb in the southern Red Sea, I had fifty knots of wind on the port quarter, and I was soaked to the skin by breaking seas crashing into the yacht. Although I was wet and cold, there was no fear in my heart. My options were to sail on into the night and get extremely tired and wet, or to find an anchorage in the storm and hold on. Fear was not an option.
The Fear Doctor is in, and it's time to listen up. Fear and negativity always travel together, and you need to banish them both from your mind. You don't want them sailing with you on the ocean of your dreams. More than once during our sailing voyage around the world, our situation was a bit tenuous, but I can't say that I was ever afraid. Instead of listening to the voice of fear, I focused on doing those things that kept us safe, and you should do the same.
Fear should be a warning rather than a way of life. Unfortunately some people adopt a fear-based existence, and fear becomes a major driving force in their lives. Most people fear the wrong thing. Advertising loves the gospel of fear because it sells. Fearing the unlikely and the absurd is largely a waste of time and energy and misdirects your focus. In most cases, the thing that you fear is not the enemy. It is fear itself that is the real problem.
We have a saying in our family, "Abbotts always come through." We have a solid conviction that no matter what happens, God can take our challenges and turn them into something good. We have no reason to fear.
Fear comes in many sizes and shapes. The list of things to fear is endless, and if you are not careful, fear can control your life. For most people, their greatest fear is the fear of death. Everyone needs to remember that it's never over until God says it's over.
Every major adventure in my life has involved positive reframing. Life threatening challenges may have higher stakes, but the reframing is the same. You get to choose the meaning of every event of your life.
You have the privilege of deciding the meaning of every event in your life. You can choose a meaning that empowers you, or you can interpret it in a negative fashion so that it becomes a weapon of self-destruction. The frame you place around an event makes all the difference.
Some people believe that they can pull themselves up by their own bootstraps. The truth is just the opposite. If you ever live your dreams, it will be with the help of other people. And if the real truth be told, whatever you accomplish is a gift from God. You may be more intelligent than Einstein, but if you don't understand that everything you have comes from the hand of God, you are dumber than a log. Intelligence is an unearned gift, and it's not something that you brag about, it's some thing for which you are grateful.
The handwriting is on the wall. You need to get in agreement with God about who you are and what you can do with your life. You don't want to miss out!
When Jesus said, "All things are possible to him who believes," he announced that your personal beliefs rule your world. If your beliefs are right, your life is right. If your beliefs are twisted and destructive, you will live a miserable life. If your beliefs are positive, and if you look at the world through eyes of possibility and love, there is no limit to how good your life can become.
Spiritual self help can be summed up in a single word - excellence. When you pursue excellence in every area of your life, amazing things happen. You don't need to read dozens of self help books. Instead, you need to discover the excellence that God placed within. Excellence is who you are, and it is the royal road to your dreams.
Faith isn’t something that must be present before you move in the direction of your dreams. Rather it’s something that develops after you start moving. When you start out, you don’t see how your dreams are possible. Nevertheless, the moment you take the first step, faith instantly comes into your life. Never look at faith as the path to a life of leisure. God gave you faith so you could see things other people can’t see and do things other people can’t do.
In this great adventure called life, you have a choice. You can choose to live in your digital world with a 55-inch wide screen existence and cheer others on who are living their dreams, or you can have a real life. You can totally immerse yourself in the natural world and experience the truly miraculous. That natural world is free, and you can touch it, breathe it, embrace it, and love it. And if you do immerse yourself in it, you will discover that everything is a miracle.
The Bible says, “As a man thinks in his heart, so is he.” Your heart is your home. It’s where you live in a world of swirling emotions. Although your thoughts control your emotions, it’s your emotions that rule your world. If you want to take charge of your life, you must control the storm of thoughts blowing through your heart and mind.
Although most people believe they make their decisions on a rational basis, the truth is that emotions dominate their life. In the tug of war between reason and emotion, your emotions almost always win. It’s an unfair contest with the outcome rigged in favor of emotion.
You are responsible for the chemistry of your brain. You create it by the type of thoughts you think during the first twenty years and subsequent years of your life. You can create the chemistry of depression and dysfunction, or you can create a brain chemistry that predisposes you to joy, a positive attitude, and achievement. If you don't like your present chemistry, you can change it by changing what you put into your mind.
When Jesus said, "As you believe, so shall it be done unto you," he did not add any qualifications to the statement. He didn't say, "As your genome is, so shall it be done unto you." Your beliefs trump your genome every time. You are not a prisoner of your genome. Instead, your genome is the launching pad for your life and nothing more. It's what you do with your genome that counts. Epigenetics gives you the power to take what you have been given and to make it into something great.
God gave you a good mind and He expects you to fill it with good things. God gave you eyes, and He expects you to look at things of excellence. You have the power to transform your life by filling your vision with positive things. You can learn how to look at the world through eyes of possibility and love.
I can change who I am by changing what I put into my mind. When I change my mind, I change my life. This law of change never fails. Although the wheel of change turns slowly, it always turns in the direction of what I put into my mind. I fill my mind with positive thoughts so that my life moves in a positive direction.
I have been making positive notes to myself for my entire adult life. My positive notes have taken me around the world on a sailboat, and God willing, they will take me around the world in my Land Rover. It's time for you to get out your file cards and create some Positive Notes to Self and go over them multiple times each day. It won't be long before those notes become a part of your life, and you will never be the same.
Self-help is not the creation of man. It's the creation of God, and it's built into the fabric of the moral universe. There is no mystery here. If you do your part, God will do his part, and amazing things will happen. But first you must do your part so that God has something to work with. When you work like everything depends on you and trust like everything depends on God, you have discovered the secret of self-help.
Mark Twain once remarked that life doesn’t consist so much of facts and events. Instead, it consists mainly of the storm of thoughts blowing endlessly through my mind. Most of the time, I can deal with the facts of life without too much difficulty. It’s the storm of thoughts that causes such a problem. I will die a thousand deaths before my final day of reckoning comes. Most of my problems never happen anywhere except in my mind.
Your brain is a powerful affirming machine that affirms the negative just as easily as the positive, the bad just as easily as the good. Your brain is positive about many things that are factually untrue. And when you are positive about the wrong things, your positive thinking actually gets you into trouble. It turns out that positive thinking is not always positive when you are affirming dark, destructive thoughts.
I am a daktari without borders. I am not sure when and where borders disappeared from my mind, but sometime in the last quarter century, I became a citizen of the world. Wherever I am on planet earth, I feel at home in my borderless world. Sometimes I get the feeling that borders are fictional boundaries created by the rich and powerful to maintain their power and wealth.
Sometimes a simple yes or no is not good enough. You want to make sure the message is clearly understood. In times like that you say, "That's affirmative, or that's negative." Such was the case when we sailed our catamaran into Israel after sailing up the Red Sea and navigating the Suez Canal. We needed to be understood the first time.
You are on a no limits expedition in which there is no limit to how good your life can become. Life is a test, and if you don't quit, you pass the test. Quitting is a terminal disease for which their is no cure, and doubting is nearly as bad. If you are going to doubt anything at all, you should doubt your limits.
Although I have lots of things that I would like to see and do, my bucklet list does not contain any of those items. My list consists of great ideas that I want to make a part of my life. When that happens, my life will truly be my message. Until then, I have work to do.
Don't believe everything you hear when your mind talks to you. Your mind is always in replay mode, and much of what it says is frankly wrong and out of touch with reality. If you don't like what you hear when your mind talks to you, you have the power to change the message. When your mind starts telling you twisted and depressing thoughts, it time to switch to a different channel. When the inner ogre gets out of control, you don't have to take the abuse. Instead, beat him into submission with positive self-talk from the Positive Self-Talk Store. A few mintues of reading Dr. Dave's positive self-talk will send the inner ogre on his way.
Maximum Strength Positive Thinking tells you what to say when you talk to your mind, and what to say when your mind talks to you. You have a lot of things to discuss with your mind, and Maximum Strength Positive Thinking tells you what you should be talking about. You don't need to spend years searching for empowering ideas that make it possible to live your dreams. It's already right here in a self-talk format. The Law of Positive Self-Talk states, "You can change who you are by changing what you say when you talk to your mind." If you don't like what you hear when your mind talks to you, you have the power to change the message. Although the wheel of change turns slowly, it always turns in the direction of what you put into your mind. When you fill your mind with positive self-talk and more than one-hundred Power Graphics, your life improves by leaps and bounds. Maximum Strength Positive Thinking is now available in eBook Format at Amazon, iTunes, Kobo and Barnes and Noble. Make your life better today by putting Maximum Strength Positive Thinking into your mind.
The Programmer’s Manual for Your Mind contains the tools you need to reprogram your mind with a positive operating system. It’s your Personal Tool Kit that shows you how to change the way you think and feel. Your mind is actually being programmed all the time without you being aware that it’s happening. The problem is that someone else is doing the programming. Make no mistake about it. If you don’t program your mind, other people will. Whether you like it or not, you are engaged in mortal mental combat, and your mind is ground zero. If you let your culture, the media, the government, and politicians do the programming, you will be in real trouble. You will not be running your own mind. They will be running it. You will not be living your dreams. You will be living theirs.The Programmer's Manual for Your Mind is now available in ebook format at Amazon, iTunes, Kobo and Barnes and Noble. Start reprogramming your mind today using the tools found in the Programmer’s Manual for Your Mind. Remember, if you want to have a positive mind, nobody can stop you.
The Owner's Manual for Your Mind contains thirty-one Change Principles that empower you to make a life. You no longer worship at the altar of security, content to only make a living. The Change Principles show you how to make a life. Don't timidly tiptoe through life waiting to go for your dreams. You have only one life. The clock is ticking, there are no timeouts, and there is nothing to wait for. Today is the only day you can make your dreams happen. Seize the day. Live as if you are a great person. Renew you mind with positive and empowering thoughts. Achieve excellence in at least one area of your life. Adopt zero tolerance to negative thinking. Don't accept any limitations. Never quit working on your dreams. The Owner's Manual for your mind is now available in ebook format at Amazon, iTunes, Kobo and Barnes and Noble. Don't just make a living. Instead make a life using the thirty-one Change Principles found in Owner's Manual for Your Mind. There are no limitations. There are only limiting beliefs.
Overcoming depression is hard, perhaps the hardest thing you will ever do. But if you want to have a mind free from depression, nobody can stop you. Your emotions are a reflection of your thoughts. When you change your thoughts, your emotions automatically follow. You don't have to battle the negative and twisted emotions echoing in your mind. Instead you need to learn how to change the way you think, and your emotions will naturally take care of themselves. The challenge you face in depression is to change the way you think. If you want to change the way you think and feel, you are going to have to change your inner dialogue. You are going to have to talk to your mind in a different manner. A persistently positive focus creates a consistently positive mind. The battle for a positive mind is fought on the battlefield of focus. In order to break the back of depression, you will have to learn how to persistently and consistently control your mental focus. Zero Tolerance to Negative Thinking is now available in ebook format at Amazon, iTunes, Kobo and Barnes and Noble.
God is love and works by love. The power and presence of God in my life is love. Every time I see love, I see God's hand at work. Every time I feel love, I experience God's presence and power. When my mind is full of thoughts consistent with God's love, my thoughts are healthy, and my mind is exactly the way God means for it to be. When my heart is full of emotions consistent with God's love, my emotions are healthy, and they are exactly the way God means for them to be. There is no limit to how good my life can become when I open my heart and mind to the power of His love. God loves and accepts me the way I am, but He loves me to much to let me stay that way. He loves me from the top of my head to the tip of my toes, and it does not get any better than that. For the rest of my life I will max out on God's love. Real Power: Maxing Out on God's Love is now available in ebook format at Amazon, iTunes, Kobo and Barnes and Noble.
Positive Christian Self-Talk is as much about God as it is about you. The self-talk contained in this book is designed to change your life. You learn to think the way that God thinks and speak the way that God speaks so that your self-talk has real power. It's time to get in agreement with God about who you are and what you can do with your life. It's time to speak your new life into existence. Jesus said, "As you believe, so shall it be done unto you." Jesus was talking about positive expectations. You don't get what you want, you get what you expect. It doesn't matter if your expectations are positive or negative, you still get what you expect. If you want positive self-talk to work in your life, all of your self-talk must be forged in the fires of positive expectations. It's time to jump into God's ocean of love and have a life changing experience. Positive Christian Self-Talk points your life in the right direction and gives you the power to make the trip. Positive Christian Self-Talk is now available in ebook format at Amazon, iTunes, Kobo and Barnes and Noble.
Too many people have a false model for change. They try to change their life by trying to change their life, and that is the recipe for failure. They are skipping all the steps that make change possible. Big changes don’t involve tweaks. They involve jumps. This book contains quantum self-talk that you need to have in your mind so that you can make a quantum leap to the next level. One hundred Power Graphics make it easy to put positive self-talk into your mind. The power of positive repetition is immense, and when your mind starts repeating quantum self-talk back to you, hang on tight, because you are ready to make a quantum leap to the next level. You have thousands of quantum leaps to make in your life, and quantum self-talk is a great place to start. Happy quantum leaping. Quantum Self-Talk is now available in ebook format at Amazon, iTunes, Kobo and Barnes and Noble.
Many people believe change is impossible. Most of the time they are confusing personality with personal behavior. The basic human personality is relatively constant over time, but human behavior can and does change. Personal change happens when people change the way they think. I have numerous patients formerly addicted to meth, cocaine, heroine, and alcohol, who escaped their addictions without ever going to rehab for treatment. They simply arrived at a point in their life where they no longer wanted to be prisoners of their addictions. They had experienced enough misery to last ten lifetimes, and they said no more. They changed their belief about who they are and what they can do with their life, and they became a different person who was chemical free. I am grateful to those patients, because they proved beyond a shadow of a doubt that people in the worst circumstances can and do change. Because of them, I am committed to helping people change their lives one belief at a time using positve self-talk. Positive Self-Talk Yellow Book is now available in ebook format at Amazon, iTunes, Kobo and Barnes and Noble.
Mark Twain wrote, “Life does not consist mainly, or even largely, of facts or happenings. It consists mainly of the storm of thoughts that is forever blowing though one’s head.” Mark Twain was right. Life consists mainly of the storm of thoughts that blow through your mind. The events of life can be trivial, tragic, and even monumental in nature, but the events themselves have little power. It’s the storm of thoughts about those events that controls our lives. Surviving the storm of thoughts is how we spend most of our time. No matter what we do, the storm still blows, and to a significant degree shapes our lives. Surviving the storm is something we do every day all day long. An entourage of thoughts accompanies each event in our lives. Those thoughts can be positive, negative, or most likely, something in between. Those thoughts are the battleground where we come to our agreement with life. Those thoughts define who we are and what we can do. You need to learn how to control the storm of thoughts blowing through your mind. Positive Self-Talk Gold Book is now available in ebook format at Amazon, iTunes, Kobo and Barnes and Noble.
You can change who you are by changing what you say when you talk to your mind. Just be sure you are speaking a language your mind understands. Your brain speaks to you in its own language, and if you speak to it in the same way, it immediately responds in a powerful fashion. That’s why change proceeds most rapidly when you talk to yourself using the language of the mind. If you don’t speak the language of the mind, you may as well stop talking until you learn it. The three most powerful components of the language of the mind are images, sounds, and emotions. When my brain wants to get my attention, it does not send a text or an email. It blows me away with sights, sounds, and emotions. If you want to get your brain’s attention, you need to do the same thing. Send a message full of sights, sounds, and emotions. Start speaking the language that your mind understands. Positive Self-Talk Silver Book is now available in ebook format at Amazon, iTunes, Kobo and Barnes and Noble.
Living small serves no great purpose. Living as if you are a great person is a powerful idea that changes lives, and those who take it seriously change their world. Living as if you are great means you live as if your dreams are possible and work each day to make them happen. You act as if you cannot fail. In order to live as if you are great, you have to think the way great people think, talk the way great people talk, and act the way great people act. Great people think, talk, and act their dreams into existence. If you ever become great, it will be because you think great thoughts, repeat great self-talk, have great expectations, and act as if you cannot fail. Some people wrongly believe that change is impossible. Leopards don't change their spots, and zebra stripes are forever. But people are different. People change their stars. They change their stripes, and their spots disappear in an instant of time. That instant happens the moment they develop positive expectations and believe they have the power to change. Positive self-talk and positive expectations can take you anywhere you want to go. Positive Self-Talk Purple Book is now available in ebook format at Amazon, iTunes, Kobo and Barnes and Noble.
A persistently positive focus creates a consistently positive mind. The same is true of your self-talk. It must be persistent, positive, and specific to have maximum impact. Lack of persistentce has laid more dreams to rest in the cemetery of failure than any other cause. There is zero chance that you will succeed on your first attempt. If your dreams are great, You will fail again and again on your way to the top. Before you can be great, you have to be good. Before you can be good, you have to be bad. Before you can be bad, you have to try. Millions of people stop at try. Thousands get stuck at bad. Hundreds quit at good. A few go all the way to great. If you don't have persistence, you willl never make the trip from try to bad to good to great. Positive Self-Talk Red Book helps you develop a persistently positive focus so that you can develop a consistently positive mind. More than one-hundred Power Graphics contain powerful thoughts that you need to have in your mind. Positive Self-Talk Red Book is now available at Amazon, iTunes, Kobo and Barnes and Noble.